Cycle 6 Week 3

Wow, time flies. I can't believe that it's already been two weeks since I last posted. My sixth cycle of chemo went really well. The days when I was hooked up to the chemo bag passed fairly quickly, which means I made it through all of my chemo cycles without having any pump problems or chemo spills at home, yay!!!!

My final day in the clinic with my nurses was a little surreal. I've spent the last four months relying on these men and women to make sure my vitals are ok, ensure that I receive the proper drugs, and stand ready as a trusted source of information and support. While I was happy to be finished getting toxic chemicals pumped through my veins, I wasn't happy to be ending my visits with these amazing people. My time spent on chemo was a lot better than I thought it would be because of them.

I was also sad to be ending my frequent meetings with some of the other patients who were/are on the same treatment. As much as my friends and family have helped over this trying time, no one can understand as well as the patient in the chair next to me who's summoning the same hope and facing the same fears as me. Plus, sharing side effect stories made the whole thing feel something like a club--albeit one that no one would want to join! But we were in it together, and sharing our stories during our clinic visits made the experience a lot easier. During one of my earlier cycles, I met a patient who really wasn't doing so well (same treatment as me). She was barely able to eat, completely depressed, and feeling utterly alone in her situation. After a small group of us started talking and supporting each other,  her mood, and condition, dramatically improved. I can't stress the importance that personal relationships play in getting through something like chemotherapy.

For my bad days after the chemo infusions, my sister, Sarah, flew out from Colorado. Having her with me was such a HUGE help, and my mom was certainly relieved to have the additional person around to take care of Zachary. Plus, Sarah and I did some serious wedding planning for her wedding next year. I've been the most tired this sixth cycle, so sitting around looking at wedding stuff online was a welcomed task. Other than that, I think I slept more hours than I was awake during the second week of the cycle!

I'm currently in week three of cycle six. I'm not recovering from the fatigue as quickly as I did during the first five cycles, but it's not terrible. My hemoglobin (the stuff that carries oxygen around in our blood) hasn't rebounded as quickly as usual, so that's probably contributing to the tired feeling (and headaches I had for a few days), but so far the doctors don't think a blood transfusion is necessary. I'll keep my fingers crossed that my counts increase by my next blood draw on Monday.

On July 5th, I get my end of treatment PET and CT scans. Sometimes I feel calm about it, sometimes I feel like a basket case. I'm trying to keep the same attitude I had going into my mid-treatment scans: hopeful that I get clean results, but not expecting anything. The doctors have warned me that many patients do show some activity on the PET scan, but that the activity can simply indicate inflammation, not active lymphoma. If that's the case, they will rescan in another six weeks. I don't know about you, but that does not sound like a fun six weeks to wait...

So that's where I am. I truly can't believe I've already finished six cycles. I won't say that it feels like it went by quickly, because it doesn't feel that way. There were days when I was taking it minute by minute, and the hand on the clock couldn't move fast enough. But with the help and support of so many friends and family, I made it through. Plus, I've noticed that some of the comments on this blog are from people I've never met who were inspired or touched by one of my posts, and that in itself has made me feel like something really good has emerged from something so terribly bad--so thank you all for all of your kind words.

Hope everyone enjoys the weekend!!!